We can't help who we fall in love with. 3:13:00 AM

I swear it sucks when you have no one to talk to about shits that you've bottled inside. All kinds of feelings are mixed; hate, anger, love, jealousy, sadness... I wish my heart would be different. I wish it wouldn't be so selfish. It only causes pain. FUCK this emotional shit. Seriously, it's hard.

I'm trying my best. I'm just different.
It usually happens when you're...
I can't continue...

You're in my life. 12:46:00 AM

Okay holidays are here, haven't been blogging much... Alot has been happening, hope things would get better. Pls. I need that bit of luck now. I can't wait for the weekend, I bet it's going to be great. haha well I'll blog whenever I can. till then!


Friendship is a priceless gift that cannot be bought of sold,
but it's value is far greater than mountains made of gold.
For gold is cold and lifeless, it can neither see nor hear,
and in time of trouble it has no power to cheer.
It has no ears to listen nor heart to understand,
it cannot comfort or reach out a helping hand.
So when you ask god for a gift
be thankful if he sends you not diamonds, pearls or riches
but the love of real true friends.

Happy days 12:34:00 AM

TOY STORY 3

It was one of the few highlights of my life. THANK YOU Jeremy and lil, you have no idea how much it meant to me. Yes I know all this over toys? yea. It's going to be part of me someday. :)

Friendship. 

Missing you 3:21:00 PM

Every time I think of you
I always catch my breath
And I’m still standing here
And you’re miles away
And I'm wondering why you left
And there’s a storm that’s raging
Through my frozen heart tonight

I hear your name, in certain circles
And it always makes me smile
I spend my time,thinking about you
And it’s almost driving me wild
And there's a heart that’s breaking
Down this long distance line tonight

There’s a message, in the wires
And I’m sending you this signal tonight
You don’t know, how desperate I’ve become
And it looks like I’m losing this fight
In your world I have no meaning
Though Im trying hard to understand
And it's my heart that’s breaking
Down this long distance line tonight


And there’s a message that I’m sending out
Like a telegraph to your soul
And if I can’t bridge this distance
Stop this heartbreak overload


I ain’t missing you at all
Since you’ve been gone, away
I ain’t missing you
No matter, what my friends say
I ain’t missing you, I aint missing you
I can lie to myself
And there's a storm that's raging
Through my frozen heart tonight
I aint missing you at all
Since you’ve been gone, away
I ain’t missing you,
No matter, what my friends say
Aint missing you
I ain’t missing you, I aint missing you
I can lie to myself
I ain’t missing you
I aint missing you..

School scmool... 11:16:00 AM

Okay it's friday the fouth of June, 9.45am. I'm in school just sitting around not doing anything at all... I have no idea why I'm here in the first place, boredem is killing me.. Oh well at least on the bright side is that it's a friday! After school I have plans to meet Lilly, heading down to town to check out the summer collection.. Then again I have no idea why I'm here... Jeremy has been in army now for about four weeks already, I might meet him later, not so sure if he can come home today.. :( I hope he could... Oh well oh well I hope the days get better form no on..

13 more days!! I've been waiting for 10 years for that day. :) haha

I'd never sing of love, if it does not exist.. 4:33:00 PM

Wasted Love 6:22:00 AM

I'm having a feeling of enormious pain that is more then anything imaginable. It cannot be cured by medicine, or treated by anything but time. For those that know this feeling too well, it is not a physical pain that can be described, but soemething deep inside. Breathing gets hard, eating becomes tasteless, and love, well, what is love anymore. You forget. Yet you remember, remember how to love, and who you love - which makes it hurt so bad. Let it go people say, but how can you. Feelings are feelings, and you love who you love. Heartbrakes occur most when you love someone you are not suppose to.

Rollerblade-TRS 7:18:00 PM

#01- New Jack Skates!! :)

• Structure: external cuff
• Frame: Street (UFS). Super-Lock groove
• Bearings: SG5

* smiling ear to ear *

Look at that beauty... & that beast! 

I could go on... haha

Hidden Feelings 2:34:00 AM

I hurt inside
and cry,
because I can't tell you
about my feelings for you.

You are my friend
and I'm yours too.
That's why I don't want to tell you
how my heart enjoys being with you.

I don't want to ruin our friendship
by wanting to start a relationship
but I need to tell you,
cuz i can't learn how to stop loving you.

If I Could Tell You 2:30:00 AM

When I see you in the morning
it brightens up my day
there are so many thoughts on my mind
so many words I want to say

I want to tell you how I feel
but the words I can not find
they're all mixed up with my thoughts
that are running through my mind

I've been keeping it locked up
because I know there's not a chance
you never look my way
you don't even take a glance

You don't even know you're doing this
toying with my heart
I wish I could just tell you
but I don't know where to start

Should I tell you how much you mean to me
or how bad I want to be with you
if I were to say these things
how would you react, what would you do

Would you never talk to me again
would you never look my way
that would just bring me back
to where I am today

Then I'd start all over
and choose a different route
to make you understand
my feelings that want out

I don't know what to do
or even how to say
maybe I should lock it up
and keep myself away

My heart would ache even more
but maybe for the good
I just really want to tell you
only if I could.

Truth Number Fourteen-Feelings Never Go Away. They Just Get Buried And Resurface At The Most Unexpected Moments...

In Between 2:02:00 AM

Between love and friendship
I'm waving like a lost ship
Between black and white
Grey takes away my sight

Between doubt and certitude
How can I have such an attitude?
I no more bear the confusion
Tell me is it truth or illusion?

I was dreaming when there came
A strange feeling I can not name
Since long you've been my only mate
My soul only you can penetrate

Inside me only you can see
Like sugar in a cup of tea
Like the door knows the key
Like the flower waits the bee

Today it is clearly seen
In between I should never have been
To a strong feeling you were blind
Something your eyes no longer hide

To your love I can fake
Not knowing my heart you can break

:P 12:32:00 AM

 Jesus was walking along one day, when He came upon a group of people surrounding a lady of ill repute. It was obvious that the crowd was preparing to stone her, so Jesus made His now-famous statement, "Let the person who has no sin cast the first stone."

The crowd was shamed and one by one began to turn away. All of a sudden, a lovely little woman made her way through the crowd. Finally getting to the front, she tossed a pebble towards the woman.
Jesus looks over and says, "I really hate it when you do that,
Mom."

Blood rush 8:46:00 PM

It hurts when you leave.. Can we rewind the hands of time to back where we were always together?.. You've change my life.

I wish time would stop 8:22:00 PM

What a week, fridays that were not as planned. Jeremy was suppose to book out today but he had confinement... I'm kinda sad, hope he's doing well. hmmm.. Well there's always the next long weekend.
Right now I'm just chilling at home with lilly. It's been awhile since we spent time together.. maybe tonight we'll do something.. Well that's all that has been happening beside the fact of boring school.. hmmm..


Caught in the middle.

Lord Jesus and Guardian Angels, watch over those whose names you can read in my heart. Guard over them with every care and make their way easy and their labours fruitful. Dry their tears if they weep; sanctify their joys; raise their courage if they weaken; restore their hope if they lose heart, their health if they be ill, truth if they err, repentance if they fail.        Amen.

Clouds are beautiful. 12:29:00 AM

Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over. I'm not supposed to love you, I'm not supposed to care, I'm not supposed to live my life wishing you were there. I'm not supposed to wonder where you are or what you're doing... I'm sorry I can't help myself, I'm in love with you..

"The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship. "

only fools rush in.. 2:07:00 PM

Scream my heart out, break it, hurt it. I don't want to have it.


Not anymore.

Your making me insane 3:47:00 AM

Leave me alone now, let me think.

Bromance 2:29:00 AM

There are moments in my life that dreams can be so real that you just want to pick them up and embrace them; only to wake up and realise it's just reality playing a game on you.  It's funny how life brings you where you are right now with the choices that you've made. “They say when you are missing someone that they are probably feeling the same, but I don't think it's possible for you to miss me as much as I'm missing you right now”


A feeling that cannot be explain only to be felt by one, it is such a complicated expression of the love that I have in me. Sometimes I see you, it feels so real but I know its a figment of my imagination, it is what I want you to be.  Well it's not what's in your mind, it is what's in your heart that I see.

I miss you when something really good happens, because you are the one I want to share it with. I miss you when something is troubling me, because you are the one who understands me so well. I miss you when I laugh and cry because I know that you are the one that makes my laughter grow and my tears disappear. I miss you all the time, but I miss you most when I lay awake at night and think of all the wonderful times we spent with eachother; for those were some of the best times of my life.

The joy of meeting pays the pangs of absence; else who could bear it? 12:20:00 AM

I can't stand it anymore, emotions are driving me out of my mind. I just don't know what to do, or how to stop it. Why dose my past keeps coming back to haunt me? I know what the logical answer is, but some part of me just can't accept that.  Maybe its time I do something about it? Will someone please take a knife and stab my heart, the pain that I'm feeling might just go away.






Maybe in another life time, or universe.